School for Sexist

Well hello people who read this piece of crap (including the one person in Germany....seriously....odd but cool you read it)


The bees are buzzing the birds are chirping the sky is blue school is in session whats a girl to do?


Well, first off I lied to you the sky in OKC is actually smoked filled because apparently Hell is full and the Devil has decided Oklahoma would make great new stomping grounds and decided to set it all on fire to go with the extreme record breaking heat. Thanks Satan-appreciate it! *eye roll*


Now, about this thing they call school. I think I may have stepped back to Leave it to Beaver days where girls were not suppose to have a voice and sexism was rampant throughout the workplace and higher education. I have this Intermediate Accounting professor....who let me just call him Professor Xavier (yes, he is wheelchair bound; and no I'm not making fun of anyone in wheelchair because accidents occurs defective births happen its a part of life and I use to want to work with prosthetic devices...but back to my story). So Prof X on the first day of class told the guys its good they are wanting to become CPA's because that means they will do well in money and attract the ladies. To then continue to say that its good the ladies want to be CPA's because odds are they will go through 4 or 5 husbands in their life time by either divorce, driving them to kill themselves, murdering them, or marrying old just for the purpose of collecting the old mans life insurance policy and that we will need to know how to manage all this fortune we will get since after all we will be outliving all our male counterparts. End of Day 1.


Day 2. Prof X decides he will start the day with a sexist joke and end it with a sexist joke (apparently this is how every class starts...I have 12 weeks of this 2 days a week and 2 jokes per day= 48 sexist jokes towards women by the end of this class) But he is telling typical ones of why has evolution made women's feet smaller than mens? So they can stand closer to the stove.  On top of this he yells at people that are coming into the room so needless to say my nervous bladder kicks in because what if this girl has to pee am I going to be yelled at?? I have now entered hell-Please keep all hands and feet inside the cart at all times!


So needless to say, this makes me want to pipe up and out do his sexist jokes and tell better ones that aren't so common towards my own gender just to shut him up once and for all. Now you ask what jokes might I know, well take it from me being a tall amazon like blond female with lots of male friends and a Dad that likes to crack jokes too, I have heard them all!! So here are some:


Why are Hurricanes named after Women?
They are wet & wild when they come and take your house when they leave


How do you turn your dishwasher into a snowplow?
Give the bitch a shovel


If your women is yelling at you in the living room, what have you done wrong?
Made her leash in the kitchen too long


A man and a woman get into an argument and ends up running over the woman. Who's at fault?
The woman, she shouldn't have been out of the kitchen


Why do women never wear watches?
The stove has a clock


They say a womans' work is never done...maybe that's why they get paid less


The dog is barking at the back door, and your wife is yelling at the front door. Who do you let in first?
The dog, at least he will shut up once hes inside.




I just have to remember:
"Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition." — Marilyn Monroe 

My name is an anagram for "Ah sin!"

Well well, guess I took a bit of a hiatus from updating so here is what has been going on.

• Beyond Broke (Donations and sugar daddies are welcome!) paid off my tuition for school and one of my books alone is 450 bucks (that is also after checking online for the book too!)
• AHHHH! School starts in one week!  With that, there is an internship/job fair going on at the end of September and this girl is going to attend.
• Dating life still belongs in a romantic comedy minus the fairy tale ending
• Life is about to get busy work all day school at night and going to attempt to trim and tone at the gym the 4 nights I'm up at the school after my night classes **fingers crossed**

When I'm stressed to the max, especially during school, I always remember it could always be worse, ei:

Now on to the stuff that matters people!!


I like to assume if you are reading this bs then you have graduated to at least an 8th grade grammar level-so give yourself a big ol bear hug and pat on the back! Go You! Now stop molesting yourself and listen up....


Please I beg of you to stop spelling tomorrow-tomarrow, you're-your, and definitely-defiantly.  

Because when I get a text message that says something along the lines of "your so much fun! We are most defiantly hanging out tomarrow" It makes me want to ask you who we are undermining by hanging out on some day called tomarrow? And that just makes me look snotty so I shut my mouth and tolerate the stupidity hoping they at least spell check other things in life.


Oh also if you don't know what an Anagram is Look it up then you'll understand the title to this blog.


**********************************************


Side note: I think short guys have a tall girl fetish, they seem to be the only ones with balls to actually approach me and hit on me. Which would be all good and great but when you are standing and at a motorboat level-I'm going to have to politely say no thank you.


**********************************************





Next time I update I will losing all grasp on my sanity so I will leave you with a memorable quote....Now name that movie!
"But you can't win a marathon without putting some band aids on your nipples!"

Let's be MORE than FRIENDS

First off I'm a super straight forward person.

I'm not the type to just casually stand idly by if I like a guy, I have no issue approaching someone saying "hey here's my number we should hang out sometime" I appreciate the same in return, because let's face it I'm blond I don't catch on to the hints of casual flirting meaning you like me. You basically need to go caveman style on me-club me over the head drag me back to your cave by the hair and then and only then will I know "Oh Wow, this guy actually has an interest in me" (Side note: I'm not talking about taking advantage of me or getting raped lets clear that up right now!!) 

I don't enjoy the games of dating and I don't have the time for games...If you like me and I like you then lets go! Stop with all this bullshit I'm going to wait 3 days before I call so I don't seem desperate crap because the entire purpose of dating is to get to know someone and see if you would actually enjoy their company more often and how the hell are you going to do that if you ignore the person for 3 days and make them think that you have no interest in them for who knows what reason! Guys listen up, when you do this and the girl actually likes you it is hard as hell to not send a text your way and then they begin to semi crack thinking "Was I ugly? Am I too fat for him? Did I have something stuck in my teeth? Wait we hugged twice doesn't that mean something? Maybe that was like a thank you hug and a thank god I never have to deal with you hug?etc.....:" 

And let's face it girls it is harder  for us to get rejected but step up the plate every once in a while because really what's the worse thing that is going to happen is that person is going to go "no thanks" Well that is just dandy, your best friend is hotter anyways!!

Also, not sure if it is just me but I really appreciate when the person does explain why no additional date and is honest about it because how are you suppose to improve yourself with out some productive criticism? Sure some of the things they may not like about me I won't even think twice about but others I'd be like "Oh wow I had no idea I did that. That is awful of me!"

To conclude, everyone knows pretty shortly if you they want to spend time with someone I mean after all why are you hanging out to begin with....so stop all the games! The world would be so much easier to be straight forward. So here's a hypothetical list of people I would always say yes to so there will never be a question about it:

Uncle Jesse Have Mercy

Zach Morris because who wouldn't

Kelly Kapowski because who didn't want to be her

Pauly D just because it would be highly entertaining

Batman because he's ripped

Johnny Depp no matter what character or outfit he is in

Billy Bob Thornton just because his confidence is sexy as hell

Ryan Lebar just to see if I could turn him straight

And all my childhood/high school crushes from Owasso as follows in chronological order

Michael-we always sat next to each other cause of our last names just a pretty awesome guy

Jeff-7th grade sat next to him during science and crushed hard

Kenneth-because he was mr bad boy, the crush was so bad I stuttered anytime he was in sight

John-He had pretty eyes but he was a grade younger than me

Isaac-He was a grade older but who knows why I liked him-prob because he was taller than me

Music is my Mistress

This post is just about music I like that isn't on the radio. Disclaimer: I listen to everything so I'm sure there will be plenty you will dislike!


Lissie is a very under appreciated artist in America





Jonathan Tyler and the Northern Lights is a great rock band



Just a good electropop song





I love all of Mickey Avalon's stuff *** Do the Jane Fonda!



Been listening to Meriwether for about 10 years now and still love every single song and they are phenomenal live:



Bryan J has a beautiful voice check out his cover of Pretty Wings if you want to hear him live but here's my favorite of him:



Both of these artist are great on their own but this song's lyrics hit home for so many people! If you like Erik check out his song called hurtful

Knowledge is power, now learn to DRIVE!

Okay, first off I know you are the best driver on the road and everyone else just happens to be the idiot. 


All Oklahoma people think they are the best drivers and Texas thinks they are the best drivers but in truth a mass majority of drivers are just idiots that were lucky to pass the test. Not saying I'm a superior driver by any means but my dad did teach me some things that they don't teach you in drivers ed or test you on that will help you anytime you are driving. So here they are:


1.    Highway Numbering System-Highways running East/West start with an even number while Highways running North/South start with an odd number. Also any route divisible by 5 (ei, I-40) is intended to be major arteries of travel. While three digit highway numbers tend to be bypass highways that will take you through the actual major city. 


2.    Sign Placement-When you are driving and you see the route sign saying a town or highway number then you see that little sign above saying which exit to take. Take note to the placement of that exit sign. If it is positioned on the left of the route sign-this means your exit will be on the left. If it is positioned on the right of the route sign-this means your exit will be on the right. If it is positioned directly over the middle-this means stay in that lane. If it doesn't have an exit sign-it means  to just continue on the highways. Please pay attention to this one seriously it makes your life soooooo much easier!!


The reason I bring up these two tips, is I'm tired of getting behind people that don't know them and then decide to cut me off on the highway cause its a last minute "oh crap!" decision on their part. Or they travel at a slower rate causing more danger on the highway cause others are rushing up behind them.

Snap, Crackle, POP!!

I had an unbelievable 4th of July weekend....and I don't mean it was spectacular (which it was). I mean that stuff that happened seemed straight out of a movie.


First off, Scott (my pretty awesome brother) was home from Maryland so everyone was stoked to see him. Since he was home everyone headed home for the holiday to hang out so that made my mom's house a youth hostel-grand total of 9 people + other people that visited and left.


I, however opted out of sleeping on an air mattress and stayed with Sierra at her place the entire...it's the little things in life you have to smile about such as not waking up on the floor cause the mattress deflated. So here goes a weekend breakdown.


Saturday:
         Sierra, Matt, and myself decided to head to Oologah lake to swim after having breakfast with the family. As soon as we get in the water a couple hanging on a raft asked if we were one of them...slightly confused Matt asked what they meant. The couple explained that they were having a narcotics rehab sober living celebration at the lake that weekend and that were there 200 of them there and they thought we were one of them. Matt's response was simple sorry but no we aren't...they swam away fast. We then were wondering if we looked like former crack heads with our full set of pearly whites and clear skin and no tattoos and not chain smoking cigarettes to replace one addiction with another. They then start a serenity prayer in the middle of the water. When we were laying out there was man arguing with a woman about stealing his rafts and the rangers got involved. Then about 20 minutes later we are in the water again and this boat is cranking the engine and it is obviously water logged but the dad did not give up and it is floating towards the swimming section as he cranks it one last final time when the motor lights on fire. The rangers on shore are still dealing with the raft ordeal and Sierra with her super whistling powers saves the day to get their attention where they casually walk to the fire while another couple dashes to the fire and grab the extinguisher out of their boat and have the fire out before the rangers get down to shore. Fast forward another 30 minutes and the man is getting arrested by the sheriff.


Later in the evening Sierra said we should have worn our new shirts. Our Uncle has a pharmacy and they sell store t-shirts that on the back say "Where do you get your drugs?" Haha Classic!





Sunday:
        Hung out at the lake again then started our family festivities and celebrated with fireworks. Had some delicious food and some pretty loud firecrackers. But Sierra and Shelb's friend Luke had the "Manly man firework package" Packed full of fountains and sparklers-pretty sure his were voted the best....or maybe the funniest.





Monday:
        We all celebrated with a late lunch with my dad and his parents and got to visit with them for a bit. Now if only they would cook burgers like that for Christmas instead of random selection of shrimp, chili, and cheese....

PEZ mobile

So this post is rather pointless, but I can't help it.


I was driving tonight and out of the corner of my eye, this beautiful car caught my attention. So of course I had to loop back around and snap some pictures because I aspire to be this awesome one day!








SWEET!!